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~ the issue identified…

Since the biopsy I have been feeling pretty good. The strange pinching feeling deep inside my chest has stopped yet I notice that I am gasping for air more and there is a different feeling across my chest. I called both doctors offices to let them know and see if this is a normal post procedure. 

On Monday I received a call to see the respiratory specialist on Tuesday afternoon and have another xray, she has news. Great but I wasn’t sure I would sleep that night. I made arrangements for a friend to accompany me to the appointment and carried on with my day. 

Tuesday morning I walked in circles around my house, I have come to realize this is what I do when something is on my mind. I received another call to see the doctor responsible for my biopsy on Wednesday morning.

Are you keeping up with all these doctors and appointments? 

At the Tuesday appointment the doctor explained why she requested another chest xray and used the images to explain. She noticed on the images from my CT biopsy that something had changed in the left lung. The upper area of my left lung is collapsed. This explains the changes I am feeling in my chest and breathing. Then on to identification of the issue, pathology had just called her to share the results, non-hodgkins lymphoma, b-cell and aggressive. She explained a little about the cell types and that aggressive cells are a good thing, since they will respond well to treatment. I laughed a little to myself thinking of course my cells would be of the high energy variety, just like me. She went on to explain that further pathology is underway and is needed to identify more specifics in order to create the correct treatment plan. A requisition has been sent to add an oncologist to my team. Once again we wait.

I was honest and said I have heard the term non-hodgkin lymphoma before but don’t really know what it is. I respect her response in that the oncologist will be able to better inform me on the details. This is fair and goes along with my one day at a time approach. I will be sure to ask many questions once I meet with an oncologist.

Another day of reality, this is my life. My friend and I had lunch and talked about the information we had just heard. I am at a very nice point in my life to deal with this, I feel at peace with my life. This is an oxymoron yet true, I have no job to worry about at this time. No pressure to explain myself to anyone. I have learned to live simply and this has been one of life’s greatest gifts. 

My friend accompanied me to the Wednesday appointment with the thoracic surgeon. The standard questions and a little curiosity about my life and currently not working, he asked what is your claim to fame? Ha! I enjoy being an enigma. We shared the information from the appointment the previous day and he is comfortable with the path things are on. It would be of no value to do anything to deal with my collapsed lung now as it is likely a result of the mass growing. 

Now that the issue has been identified things keep moving forward. I think the word cancer scares people. I have a unique way of looking at life in general and this is no different. Sure there are going to be rough days, I look at it this way, those days give me colourful stories to write about. 🙂

People ask me questions like do they know what caused it, there has been no talk regarding identifying a cause. The focus is on identifying the information needed to move forward with treatment. When chemotherapy is discussed, quickly people comment about losing my hair. Slow down, we are not at that point and we can deal with that if and when the time arises.

When I think of the size of the mass I see a large orange and laugh, I have an orange in my body…well I am not a human fruit bowl so the orange is welcome to leave at any time! ha! 

I am still me, silly, giggling and full of spirit. 

I sparkle on…one day at a time.     🙂

p.s. Please remember, No internet searches. 


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