Sometimes a goal needs a reset button…

So much for my goal date of December 9. I’m officially hitting the reset button! New goal date is February 28, 2019.

Shortly after my last post, I was assigned a full-time role for a few weeks. After a few days on the job, I applied for an 18-month maternity leave fill position with the same company. Funny how the job search process goes, apply to loads of roles online and hear nothing. Work as a temp for a while, then receive two offers at the same time. I accepted the mat leave fill and I’ve been busy learning a new role for the last month.

Feeling frustrated by applying for jobs online and hearing little in return? I highly recommend working for Kelly Services. It’s better to earn some money than no money. Even short assignments provide the opportunity to discover new companies and industries, show your personality and skills to potential employers. Consider it networking! Definitely, the best job search decision I made.

Working full-time structured hours has been an adjustment, the first week I’d come home with my head spinning and call it a night very early. I’m getting the hang of the role and settling into somewhat of a routine.

Meal planning is going well. I batch cook about four recipes every second weekend and freeze measured portions. Lots of variety to choose from for both lunch and dinner helps with portion control and healthy choices.

There is a silver lining, my new workplace has a fitness centre! I now have a regular date with the eliptical machine. I know I will achieve my reset goal. Just got a little sidetracked. It happens. Still feeling accomplished, since I achieved the main goal on my list.

Today is a pretty special day, I’m celebrating 3 years on the good side. Had a follow up at the centre and the doctor is very pleased with how well I’m doing. I look like me again with shoulder length blonde hair! I’m full of energy and it’s such a good feeling. Sparkles are still doing their job in whatever way I envision.

A little update on Vodka, he’s sitting beside me while I type. He’s doing pretty good for a little old cat. He’s slowing down with age and is still full of love, keeps an eye on me, and tries to eat my hair. We’ll be celebrating his sixteenth birthday on Christmas day. So grateful, every day is precious with my sweet furry buddy.

Happy Holidays!

As always, I Sparkle On…one day at a time.

Ciao!

 

 

 

~ walking an emotional tightrope…

For some time now I have been feeling like I am walking an emotional tightrope and am one step away from falling off into emotional darkness. 

Living in constant pain is a struggle. Each day I talk myself into being jolly and moving forward. So I work to keep my balance on the tightrope since the darkness below looks cold and unwelcoming. My preference is to stay on the bright side where the sparkles are yet the darkness keeps pulling at me. 

Today I feel like I slipped on the tightrope and am now tangled up in it. I went for the CT scan of my neck to see if there is a connection to the pain in my wrists and found out it was to be a scan with contrast, which meant another IV needle. Immediately my heart sank even though I tried to be brave. I explained to the nurse what I have been through and how my veins are not happy to be poked and to please not jiggle the needle around if it doesn’t take. He understood and tried his best but the IV didn’t work. I immediately began to cry, which totally surprised me, and said to him ‘please don’t try again, can we do the scan without contrast. Now that I am worked up the IV won’t work.’ So he spoke to the radiologist and we did the scan without contrast. Hopefully the doctors will be able to see what they need to see. 

I am still in a pretty sad mood after this and can’t help feeling that I can’t do this anymore. I am so tired of appointments and needles.   😦

It is definitely time for time away to build up my mental and emotional strength.  I need to build up some sparkle to get me through.

I sparkle on…one day at a time.   🙂