Last week I attended a true Celebration of Life for a lovely man named Carl. A man who lived life to the fullest every day. Inspiringly courageous through the most difficult of journeys. From seeing the number of people in attendance to hearing the fond memories and stories from his family and friends, there is no doubt that he touched many people’s lives.
This day was special and spoke volumes about the kind of man Carl was. From the personal stories, photos and the family video footage you could see that he found joy in the little things and injected positive energy into every thing he did. It felt right to enjoy music played by local bands and to share laughs over cocktails on this day. Just the way Carl wanted his life to be celebrated. With pyrotechnics and all.
I was introduced to his lovely wife, who had heard a lot about me throughout this journey. She looked into my eyes and said ‘I prayed for you everyday.’ My eyes filled with tears and I was speechless. Kindness is beautiful.
These life events tend to make people think. They bring up a mixture of feelings that many don’t want to address. Yet if you look at it this way, it is easier to make decisions when you choose to rather than when you are forced to. Something to think about. You will be glad you did.
It may seem strange to attend the memorial celebration for someone whom I had not met, yet I came away from this day feeling that I knew Carl. I am just sorry I had not taken the opportunity to meet him when I had the chance.
I sparkle on…one day at a time
Happy to say that I have passed another follow up with flying sparkles! Well for the most part. I am still having issues with my hands and wrists. To the point that I have stopped working because the pain is with me 24/7 making everything in life quite difficult. The doctor has ordered some additional tests and referral to a neurologist to examine the issue further. Side effects are miserable and these are not the only ones I am experiencing…
Strange as it may seem, there is something called treatment induced menopause. I had been told about this in the beginning of treatment and kinda giggled at the idea. Well now that I am officially in this state I am not giggling so much. Instead I am wondering if this unnatural push into a new physical state is playing a role in the misery of my hands and wrists. With my greater concerns about this being related to bone density loss and increase of heart issues. Time will tell. Just another odd event in this health adventure that one would never have anticipated.
Over the last few months my hair has been growing. This is a good thing. Most people ask if I will grow it out and I get caught up in the idea and say yes!! I had thought this was a good idea until my hair reached about 2 inches in length, making it a fluff ball and looking like Blanche from the Golden Girls! The texture of new chemo curl hair is course and somewhat dry with a mind of its own. At this time my hair is super thick, I think even more so than it was before which is seriously thick! So I bought some wide headbands and was convinced I would grow it. After a lot of bitching and complaining about my hair and one day of wearing a headband followed by sincere apologies to my follicles that were cursing me, I booked an appointment to cut my hair super short! After the cut I was once again happy and came to the realization that I am the most miserable I have been through this whole experience because of my hair!! It’s now four weeks later and Blanche is emerging again…cutting it off tomorrow before I start bitching again! Sad but true!
At my follow up appointment yesterday I shared my hair and misery realization with my doctor. She and I had a laugh about this since I have been a pretty relaxed and calm patient overall. I was relieved to learn that my hair is currently in an abnormal growth process, since it all grew in at once and none falls out! Over time the growth pattern will continue to change, perhaps in good and bad ways, and hopefully normalize. Learning this is a tremendous relief. Now I am happy to keep my hair super short and maybe even shave it again over the next few years! After all I have more important concerns with my body and state of health than my hair.
Only a few sleeps until I depart for a nice long rest period in Europe. I am looking forward to visiting friends and relaxing. A change of scenery in my favourite places to rejuvenate my soul and enhance my healing is just what the doctor ordered. Adventures here I come!!
I sparkle on…one day at a time. 🙂